To This New Beginning...

Well, this is my first time doing this, so I'll hope it only gets better.  I figured this would be a good way to kind of keep a log of our life and also vent out if I need to.  First off, I guess here is a little about my family and I...
I met my husband of five years now when I was a Freshman in high school.  We quickly became very good friends and began dating the spring of my Sophomore year.  We have been together literally non-stop ever since.  He is my life, my best friend, my everything.  I am so blessed to have him in my life, and I thank God each and every day for placing him in my path.
We had a little boy two years ago, and life has gotten better since that day.  He lights up the room when he's around and keeps us on our toes.  I really don't know what we did with our time before he was born because now we center our lives around him.  He is amazing, and again, I am blessed beyond measure!
So there's a little recap...The past year has definitely been the hardest though.  It started off by me becoming very unhappy with the place I worked at.  I was literally coming home in tears a few nights a week.  This was just the beginning though because in June, I actually lost this job.  At the time I didn't know what to do with myself.  I lost a lot of my self confidence due to this, but now looking back, I know God was just taking me out of a very bad situation and placing me in a better place. 
I did finally get a job that August working for a wonderful Christian man, who understands family time and is willing to work around a child's schedule.  He truly is a Godsend.  I did take a pay cut with this job and lose our family insurance (which is a lot of money now for my husband to cover us all) and have to drive over forty-five minutes.  But I am very thankful to have this job, and hopefully is will progress into something more.
After all of this, I thought the year couldn't get any worse...boy, was I wrong about that.  In November, I got really sick with cramps one night, and my husband took me to the ER.  They ran a bunch of tests, which is was decided I had a cyst on my ovaries and was pregnant.  They said it might be an ectopic pregnancy so I needed to go to the OBGYN the following Monday.  I went to my doctor as directed, and for the next two weeks had blood work done every other day to check my progress for my pregnancy.  Finally the doctor was satisfied that everything looked good and told me to take a week off and she would see me again then. 
Well, the next day I wake up spotting and not feeling too well.  I called my doctor who said not to worry about it and to call if anything got worse.  Well, I stopped spotting blood but the pain began to get worse.  Again, I called my doctor.  She said she thought I had the stomach virus and to go home and take it easy.  I did decide to go home around lunch time, and by this time, I was barely able to stand up right. 
I got home, stripped all my clothes off (I couldn't stand for anything to touch me) and laid down in bed.  I laid there for quite a while noticing that I was in more and more pain.  My left shoulder began to hurt extremely bad to the point of not being able to move it and I officially could not straighten out my body because I was in so much pain.  I tried not to worry because after calling my doctor three times, she said I was fine.  I did call my husband finally and asked him to bring me some Tylenol since we were out a home. 
Somewhere a long the line, he had talked to his Pap about me not feeling well and needing some Tylenol, and before I knew it, there was a knock on my door...So now I'm trying to throw some clothes on while not being able to move my right side (I'm right handed by the way) and doubled over in pain.  I finally get to the door, and there's Pap.  While I would like to say that I held it together really well before this point.  I guess Pap could tell that something major was wrong and asked me if I were okay.  Well, bless his heart because I began squalling because I couldn't contain my pain any longer.  He tried to help me to a chair to sit down, but at that moment I had an indescribible sharp pain shoot through my right side and I collapsed on the floor.  I then began hyperventalating and couldn't breathe.  I thought I was dying.  No doubt about it.
I finally was able to get up and by that time, my husband finally came home to check on me.  He quickly told me we were going to the ER (again).  We got there, and of course I can't recall a whole lot of everything that happened besides being in EXTREME pain!  I do remember having A LOT of tests ran and everything hurting.  I almost passed out a couple of times due to the pain and broke out into a lot of sweats.  It was crazy.  They wouldn't give me any pain medicine that would touch the amount of pain I was in due to being pregnant, so I just had to endure it all.
My doctor was called that night a couple of times.  She never did come in so I ended up getting admitted to the hospital and staying over night.  They said they thought I had an infection in my stomach and that it might be my gallbladder.  However, finally a surgeon came and saw me the next morning and called my doctor to get there immediately.  He said he was sure something was going on with the pregnancy and it needed to be taken care of immediately.  She FINALLY showed up (take note that I am NOT seeing her anymore and switched doctors shortly thereafter).  They quickly got me ready for surgery and said they would figure out what was wrong when they got in there.  Turns out, I did have an ectopic pregnancy.  I ended up losing my left fallopian tube due to this.  And the infection they thought was in my stomach was actually internal bleeding.  I was literally bleeding out and dying, and my doctor could have cared less.
So I lost a baby, a fallopian tube, a job, etc. all in one year.  It was a terrible year to say the least.  I'm finally feeling like my old self again.  My hormones have finally straightened up and I'm no longer hurting at all.  It has been a long recovery.  However, I did learn that through all that that I have a wonderful family and maybe not many friends, but a few that would do anything for my family and me.
We do want to have another baby sometime soon, but it's going to be twice as hard to get pregnant now with only one operating side.  Also, once you've had one ectopic it's more likely you'll have another, so that's a bit scary.  We are also still struggling financially due to the pay cut, more expensive insurance, and all these new "wonderful" doctor/hospital bills we are paying on.  It's ridiculous!  But we're making it and praying for a much better 2011.